I admit a probably unhealthy fascination with serial killers and true crime... Growing up hearing about how Ted Bundy tried to kill my Grandma, as well as growing up in the heart of Gary Ridgeway's hunting grounds, the fascination is understandable.

But while I read these stories with almost a clinical interest, I cannot comprehend killing a group of souls because of hate and ignorance. It makes no sense to me, and it seriously breaks my heart.

I admit to a fairly high level of naivety, only recently realized, to be honest... Where I grew up, there wasn't racism, I didn't even understand what it was until I was an adult, and it literally shocked me. I mean, yes, we learned about the Civil War and Martin Luther King, so I "knew" what it was. But that was all history right? I felt joy and pride that America overcame such things. I looked at my friends, no matter what their heritage, knowing that we were the same.

But this past year, the injustices and racial tensions, hitting so hard and fast, has made me realize just how naive I have become to think we are ALL of this mind set and the realization of how much work we still need to do. I know I am still in the majority, and that's good. But it is nowhere near enough. I unfortunately don't think we can change what is ingrained into the minds of true racists. It's what they know. It's what they were taught. But it doesn't mean we should stop trying. This isn't a fight that the black community should be fighting alone, everyone faces this issue in some situation or another, to some extent, and we can only teach by example with love and compassion. I HATE the word tolerance. I can tolerate mushrooms on my pizza, but I don't like them. I do not tolerate blacks, whites, LGBT, animals, or any other difference. I embrace them. I love them. I respect them. And I admire them. 

My love and thoughts are in Charleston today. You are all so loved, and know that the majority of America is mourning with you. Those that aren't are as monstrous as the man who committed this unspeakable act.